February 16, under the viaduct.
It was two days after Valentine’s Day when I went for a late night walk under the maze of freeways near my home. I always wear a costume, for safety purposes (I’ve learned that during late night walks, it’s best to be the scariest looking person in the vicinity). It usually sends people running the opposite direction, but I met my match under the viaduct- this horrid thing, shamelessly staring me down.
Beware of individuals with outsized egos. You may run into them at bars and pubs, commanding attention. They may appear impressive at first, but like a pustule or boil, they are simply inflated, and pop with the merest touch. I spotted the detritus of a popped ego on a recent evening in Atwater Village. This one didn’t even last past happy hour.
Spotted on a rainy night in Atwater Village.
Sometimes it’s hard to tell whether someone is being friendly or creepy.
This peel got a little too close for comfort on Hoover Street back in January. There was nothing obviously wrong, he was being perfectly friendly, but I still got a weird feeling… he had no reason for being there, he was just hanging out on the sidewalk, alone, seemingly for no reason.
Casual creeper, spotted on January 17, Hoover Street.
When walking in the city, one must always be on the lookout for organic waste. It comes in many forms, most of which are too disgusting to describe here. You’ve all seen it, stepped in it, etc. Usually organic waste is unceremoniously dumped on the ground, but here it is actually labeled with an “organic” sticker.
Also note the peel fragments masquerading as leaves, and the dental pick in the background. Dental picks are another all-too-common sight on the city streets.
Spotted on Bush Street in January
Back in January, I ventured out of my home and noticed a new shop had materialized on the main avenue. I felt myself drawn with a mysterious magnetism toward its open, incense-scented doors and through its beaded curtain to the crystal-studded cave within. Helpful clerks in long, flowing gowns glided helpfully towards me, took my hand, and made surprisingly accurate statements regarding my aura and the mass of dark energy that has taken roost in my soul recently.
I emptied my pockets of money and filled them up again with quartz, lapis and amethyst talismans, and sipped from a complimentary goblet of a sweet tea with rose petals floating in it. After several hours in this jeweled room, my new friends bid me farewell at the door, but I was immediately accosted by this unsavory fellow hanging around outside. There was something dark about him –serious bad vibes, as if he held terrible secrets under that skin, and wished me great harm. Even the plants in the windowsill seemed to scream in warning as I passed by. I held my new crystals tight, trusted my intuition and got the hell away.
Spotted back in January, stalking the customers of a New Age crystal shop.
watchoutbananapeel 