Watchout! Hidden Danger

Here’s something new. Whether it’s their intimidating appearance or a lack of better options, some peels are apparently being hired as security guards, preventing unauthorized access to restricted locations. Z.R., a watchful reader from London, spotted this fresh one on Nov. 10. So far, they seem to be limited to low-level posts like fire doors and street gutters, but we’ll see what happens. Don’t be surprised if you spot a peel guarding the entrance to your local Walgreens or convenience store sometime soon.

A peel working as a security guard.

A peel working as a security guard.

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Watchout! Jane’s Story

On a recent Saturday, Jane encountered an eerie trail of peels on the sidewalk in San Francisco. Intrigued and concerned, she followed it. Each time she thought she’d lost the trail, another peel appeared – she was on the right track. She followed the mysterious trail  through the city streets, past gardens and cafes, piers and parklets, until the trail ended at the Farmer’s Market, where Jane treated herself to a delicious and well-deserved plate of dumplings.

“Based on the erratic trail and the wide variety of peel sizes, we are looking for a desperate, possibly deranged, banana fiend,” said a source close to the investigation, who did not wish to be identified because she was not authorized to speak publicly about the case. “The bananas were also at various stages of ripeness, indicating that this lunatic will eat whatever banana comes their way,” she added. The public is advised.

This isn’t the first time that Jane has encountered a peel on the street. Back on August 1, she reported 2 sleazy specimens smoking cigarette butts on the corner. And just today, she spotted a real hot mess splayed out on the curb.

Watchout! Rorschach Test

Many thanks to home detective and armchair psychoanalyst Bob, who spotted this ambiguous shape in San Rafael on May 15.

This one looks like a small, squished clown. Or maybe the dirty ribbon that I used to play with as a child? Or actually, I think it's my old teacher, Miss Katz-Butts. Whatever it is, it's trying to ruin my life!

This one looks like a tiny, squished giraffe Or the dirty ribbon that I used to play with as a child… Or actually, I think it’s my old teacher, Miss Katz-Butts. Whatever it is, it’s trying to ruin my life!

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Watchout! Suspicious Behavior

On January 30, I ventured out of my house for a nice walk in the neighborhood. It was a lovely day, and I saw many interesting things, bought an overpriced juice, and browsed in the bookstore. The big city is a fascinating place, but it can be dangerous, too, as I discovered when I narrowly evaded these ominous characters loitering suspiciously in the neighborhood.

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Where the sidewalk starts or ends, depends on which direction you’re going.

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Spotted near a mysterious marking, on Franklin and Hillhurst.

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Yikes – Somebody lost their lunch!

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